Ramblings of a Sleep Deprived Mama – about Sleep

I’m tired.

Both my kids haven’t been sleeping very well the past few nights. They have a little cold. I’m so frustrated that Lucas still wakes up occasionally. He still sleeps with this pacifier at night —-

— only at night. And at nap time. It stays in his bed. At age 6 months I said we were getting rid of the pacifier when he was 1. At 1 I said 1.5. At 1.5 years of age I said, Okay, at two years old you are DONE with this thing. Two is the max. Now he is 2.5 and I still let him have it for sleeping. My how things change when you have kids. I don’t really care if he likes to sleep with it. It’s not affecting his speech in any way and because it only stays in his bed it doesn’t interfere with anything else in our life. I’m a big believer in letting kids do things when they’re ready – just like potty training – so I figure, if he wants to sleep with a stinkin’ pacifier, what’s the big deal? If it makes him happy, then sure.

But, I think him sleeping with it, is actually what’s causing him to wake up more. He wakes up and if he can’t find it he starts whining or crying and then I get up and get mad because I’m fumbling around at 2 o’ clock in the morning looking for the darn pacifier. I don’t know, I’ve thought about getting rid of it. I know sooner or later he’ll be ready to get rid of it. A part of me wants to leave it up to him and his own timing, but the other part of me feels like it needs to go. He only has one and once it’s gone, it’s GONE.

We are still working on the big boy/baby concept. Sometimes he wants to be a baby, which doesn’t help when I’m trying to explain things like this or that babies wear diapers and big boys wear underwear. The other day he said, “rock me like a baby.”

So of course I did.

It is SO frustrating because Joshua wakes up, I go put him back to bed and then JUST as I’m dozing off again, in 15 minutes time, Lucas wakes up. GR*$&!!!!

Please don’t flame me for letting my toddler have a binky at night, but if you have any tips or thoughts I would love to hear them. And seriously, cover your words in butterflies and kisses. I am not in the mood to deal with mom hater comments right now from people who think they are sister of the Mother Theresa.

Joshua is still waking up too, but he is only up once or twice, but more when he has a cold and doesn’t feel good, of course. I  expect him to wake up more, simply because he is still nursing. However, we are almost done with that, so I’m hoping that will help. I want to be done nursing now actually. I wonder if you can give whole milk at 11 months instead of 12? Is it that much of a difference?

Doc said I should probably night wean him. Milk can get on his teeth and it’s not good for all night sleeping. I know, I agree with her, but because I’m almost done anyways, I figure I’ll just go cold turkey then. Makes sense I think. We are suppose to start brushing his teeth every night.  (Use a toothbrush with water on it for 20 seconds. ) I am not paying for cavities.

In other news, we had a good Labor Day weekend. Hope you did too. We painted and decorated (finally)  our master bedroom. I’m really happy with how it turned out.

Joshua had his 10 month baby well visit last week. He’s weighing in at 21 pounds. Holy smokes!

Lucas turned 2.5 last week.

I am still 22.

I also still love to take naps, and because I’m super tired and I have to work tonight, I think I’ll head up for a little snooze while my lovies are sleeping…

Published by Samantha Mellen

Certified personal trainer & health coach helping women transform their lives through fitness, abundant mindset coaching and internal peace. Mom of two boys, living life in Alaska.

15 thoughts on “Ramblings of a Sleep Deprived Mama – about Sleep

  1. Here's my 2 cents on the binky issue… we took the binky from dd2 when she was 30 months and her sleep has not changed at all. She is still up at least once most nights. Like you, I used to think it was just because she couldn't find her bink and that it would get better after we took them away. Well, now she's up because she's to hot, or to cold, or can't find her teddy, etc…

  2. I don't think there is anything wrong with Lucas having a paci at night if that is what works for you. Neither of my kids took one and I wish they would have. Limiting it to his bed is a good idea.

    I will say that your doctor is WRONG about breastmilk sitting on their teeth, it's not a problem at all! If it is then both of my kids are in trouble since I am still nursing my 19 month old throughout the night (Although we are night weaning now that I am 20 weeks pregnant and need some SLEEP) Brushing his teeth at night is a great idea no matter what but the milk isn't like formula or cows milk so it won't cause cavities. 🙂

    Naps are good!!!!


  3. If it makes you feel ANY better Tilly is 3 and a half and still sleeps with her “Eddy” (pacifier). I got Harry off of his by 2 and just let them break down so he didn't want to suck on them anymore. Tilly's “Eddy's” must be better quality because we are down to 3 and they have no signs of breaking in the near future. Her dentist said that at this point it will be her decision to give them up but they are giving her an overbite so I'm hoping she gives it up soon. The overbite should correct itself when she stops. In Canada they say you can give your babies whole milk at 9 months. Since I'm Canadian I figured this applied to us (ha ha) so I started at around 10 months. Good luck with the paci issue. I wouldn't worry about it too much.

  4. ok, I am one of the “bad” moms, lol. I started introducing my kids to whole milk before a year (after 11 months). They were fine. They drank formula so I did like half formula/half whole milk that way they wouldn't notice (well it was more like 3/4-1/4 then 1/2-1/2 then 1/4-3/4 to finally all whole milk)…
    (p.s. before I get flamed too, I wasn't able to breastfeed)

    About the binky; my kids wouldn't take one so I don't know much about it (except my sister's kid was so attached to his). I'm not one of those people who will say tsk tsk you need to take it away. I agree that kids will do things when they are ready. But, on another note; I read that if you took bottles/binkys/etc. right at a year it was easier. They say (whomever “they” are) that the longer they hang on to those things, the more attached they become to them. My kids did not mind losing their bottle at a year so I figured it must be true.

    Anyway, I think now that Lucas is older it will have to be done on his terms because he can have some input into it. I have heard of people having a “binky fairy” and putting them under the pillow in exchange for a new toy (and sprinkling fairy dust/glitter/etc. on the floor to make it real. Or, I have heard about telling the kid that another baby needs it. Or I have seen people put the binky in a special bag or drawer or shadow box so they can still see it for comfort, but they can't suck on it.

    I hope you get through it o.k. I know it is very hard with 2 little people!!!

  5. We started giving Aedan whole milk around 11 months. I was worried that he wouldn't like it and it would be hard to transition. Ha! I was wrong , he loved it. I'd say go for it on the whole milk!

    As for the paci. Aedan never took one, but I have worked with a few kids that needed to get rid of it in the past. We always started by cutting a hole in it so it doesn't feel the same anymore. Most of the time that was all it took and they just stopped using them.

    Hope that helps!

  6. If breastmilk at night really caused cavities, then there would be a WHOLE lot of breastfed babies with mouths full of them 🙂

    My kids didn't use pacifiers (not from my lack of trying though!) so I have no advice except that I agree with you about letting kids wean when they are ready.

    La Leche League's stance on night weaning is that it shouldn't happen before 15 months. That's the age where the toddler can understand “no nursing after sun goes down” but since you are feeling done with nursing anyway, you might want to cut the nights out first.

    Every baby's intestines are different when it comes to whole milk. Just try some and see if he has a reaction!

  7. 1. My daughter is month younger than Lucas. We somehow forgot to give her a binky one night and that was it! You wouldn't believe it because I'm pretty sure it was glued to her lips. I'm so glad we didn't take it away and just waited… If I were you, I'd stick a few more in his bed so he can find them!

    2. Same daughter stopped getting breastmilk at 10.5 months. I used frozen but we started integrating whole milk at 11. She is fine.

    3. My other daughter is a month younger than Josh. She still wakes up 1-2 a night however we have gotten her down to just one feeding and only a quick snack. It's hard being a BFing momma!

  8. Eb was about 2 years 4 months from memory and started demaning to have her dummy during the day as well as sleep times and I realised it was getting out of control and a little silly for me to allow her to walk around with it in her gob so I just decided one day that I was going to take it, I told her one of my friends who just had a baby took it for her little bubba and showed her a photo of the new baby. First couple of nights she whinged going to bed and now shes nearly 3 and she never asks for it.

    As for cows milk. I rang the breastfeeding association and spoke with our GP who said cows milk is fine for our son who is almost 11 months. He has taken to biting my nipple and refusing to be breastfed so water and cows milk is really all I am comfortable giving him. I'm not going to breastfeed him for nearly a year to only have to buy formula for these last few weeks and give him a bottle, stuff that. He is perfectly happy on cows milk, thriving and sleeping well (finally lol).

    I honeslty wouldn't worry if u have to give Joshua cows milk, hes only a few weeks away from 1 year old. Again, thats just my opinion.

    Good luck mama, I hope you're boys sleep soundly tonight and let you have some much needed shut eye xx

  9. My two cents regarding whole milk is what difference does it make if you give it Joshua 30 days early. Really, does it matter that he's 330 days old vs 365 old? I only buy organic milk now so if I had to do it all over again, I'd use organic – and it just tastes so much better. It hurts to pay $6.49 a gallon but…

    Neither of my 3 boys would take a pacifier so I'm no help there. Sorry!

    Honey, I really feel for you and your sleep deprivation. Been there and done that!

    And please don't forget, that opinions are like buttholes, everyone has one : ) Don't take it peronally when someone leaves a mean or rude comment on your blog. They're being mean and unkind and, odds are, when they get up tomorrow morning they will still be mean and unkind. I guess we'll have to pray for them, I may not want to, but I'll do it anyway.

    Praying the sleep situations improve greatly!

    Karen in MD

  10. Can Lucas fall asleep without his pacifier at all? When we started weaning my son off of his he was around 18 months old – it was a SLOW process. We started off making him fall asleep at night without it, but we gave it to him if he woke up (easy way out, I know…). Then eventually he completely stopped waking up to demand it, but I was still giving it to him at naptime. Finally he had been doing so well at night that I decided we were going to quit at naptime – I'd give him an hour or so to fall asleep and if he didn't fall asleep I'd give him the pacifier. Then it got to the point where it didn't seem to make a difference if he had the pacifier or not, so I just threw them out and decided we were done! He's been pacifier-free since he was 21-months-old, I think? I really think it made a difference in his nighttime sleep, but time may also have made that difference. Good luck!

  11. Don't stress about the binkie! It will eventually go away. My first born had his at night until he was 3 1/2. I know so bad! But every time I was pregnant I said I would wait until after the new baby came. finally the binkie broke and the sucking was gone and so was the binkie. (my sister use to clip the ends of her kiddos binkies)

    In regards to milk i started my 3rd born on raw milk at 11 months and she has the least amount of allergies so far out of the three. and now at 2.5 she hardly ever drinks milk.
    Good luck! you are doing a great job and love the new header!

  12. I'll say what a lot of other posters have said–whole milk a month earlier is not going to do harm 🙂

    Pacifiers are tough. We got rid of Ingrid's right at two, cold turkey, threw them away outside in the big garbage so we wouldn't be tempted to get them at 2am. It was tough two nights and then she forgot about them. She does sleep better w/out them–she was a big waker looking for her nuk, like Lucas is!

    Otis is teething and will not sleep anywhere but rightnexttome for the past week or so, I am right there with you on the sleep deprivation. Snore. Good luck.

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